July marked my fifth year in tech.That’s half a decade in a career I never imagined myself in. I came into tech via trauma, so it’s always hard to answer the question about where I want to go next. But I’ve been getting that question a lot more lately. I think to understand where I want to go next (that post is coming soon), I need to reflect on where I’ve already been and what I’ve learned. With all of the time I’ve spent in tech, I’ve accumulated a toolbox of lessons – some through hard conversations, others through pushing myself beyond what I thought I was capable – that I know are useful to more than just me. Every year has added a new layer, a new ring in a tree, a new depth that shaped my understanding of tech.

There are some years where I felt stuck. There are other years — like this past one — where I’ve grown more than I could’ve imagined. Growing doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens when you listen to the people around you and you learn from them, and that extends through all of these lessons I’m sharing below:

Embrace Change

Working in tech is like standing in a river that’s constantly moving. No developer gets to work with the same stack forever, and that’s part of the excitement (and challenge). As Heraclitus put it, “No one steps in the same river twice.” That flow can be really intense – I’ve heard people commonly refer to it as drinking from a fire hose. More and more reports show that the half-life of tech-related skills is five or fewer years. That means that none of us can expect to learn something today and it will still be relevant five years from now. We have to keep learning. Embracing this flow means recognizing that your learning curve never really ends, so focus on adaptability over mastery. Small steps each day, like 10 minutes with a new framework or revisiting foundational knowledge, can keep you from feeling overwhelmed.

Personally, my role has shifted over the last five years out of circumstance and necessity. I started as a front-end developer, but I’ve also done mobile development, community building, developer experience and more. Part of this change means that you need to do frequent self-evaluations to understand the best fit for your skillset and be willing to either invest in learning something new and putting in the extra time to master it, or lean into your strengths and let it take you down that path.

People First, Always

In tech, it’s easy to get lost in code and strong opinions. The most successful people know that building relationships is just as important as building products. A study by MIT’s Human Dynamics Lab shows that top teams excel because of social connections, not individual IQs.

Let’s keep going with the nature analogies and think of your career as a garden: while your code/ability to understand a technology is the seasonal bloom, relationships are the perennials, coming back stronger year after year. The Harvard Business Review reports that 85% of job opportunities come through networking. Furthermore, Arthur Brooks, in Build the Life You Want, emphasizes the importance of building and maintaining a supportive social network for both happiness and personal growth. He argues that cultivating relationships is essential because social connections play a critical role in emotional resilience, personal fulfillment, and overall well-being.

Make it a habit to connect with people across roles – reach out, share coffee (virtual or real), and invest time in understanding their work. These connections often open doors that technical skills alone can’t. Being proactive means nurturing relationships, and that requires effort. Building a strong network isn’t just about socializing; it’s about creating genuine, mutually beneficial connections that enrich everyone’s lives.

Resilience is Your Secret Weapon

The tech industry can feel like bamboo – it spends years growing underground before it shoots up. There will be times when your career feels stuck, but that should be when roots are forming. Data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics shows that tech professionals experience 3-4 major transitions throughout their careers.

I’ve seen projects collapse and experienced layoffs myself. When I was laid off a couple of years ago, I immediately turned to my network, had conversations with people that I trusted, and invested in moving forward. Sure, it was hard and there were days that I didn’t want to get off the couch, but those conversations are what landed me my next role, and the one that I consider to be the most pivotal in my career. I’ve learned that resilience isn’t just about “bouncing back”; it’s about growing stronger through each setback. Think of resilience as a muscle you can train – each challenge strengthens it, so reflect on setbacks and see them as part of your career’s growth story.

Storytelling Makes You Stand Out

Data might be king, but storytelling is the kingdom. Think about the last time a story moved you – it probably wasn’t about numbers alone. When we hear a story that we connect to, neurons fire and happy hormones are released in our body, connecting us to the storyteller. (If you want to learn more about why storytelling is important, check out my keynote for THAT conf in 2023.)

Whether you’re pitching a project or explaining a complex concept, try to weave a narrative. The narrative also helps to provide context for your work. You’re not just coding features; you’re solving problems for real people. What are the problems? Why are you solving them? I’ve said this a bunch of times, but you could build the best product in the world, but if no one knows about it or understands what it is and why it’s valuable, it won’t matter. Frame your work as a journey, sharing the challenges and triumphs. You’ll make your work memorable and help your audience, technical or not, connect with your ideas.

Embrace “Creative Destruction”

Treat your work like a bonsai tree: prune to grow. In tech, we often need to cut away pieces of what we thought were “masterpieces” as projects evolve. This isn’t failure; it’s creative destruction. In writing, we sometimes say, “don’t be afraid to kill your darlings” or “don’t be precious about your work.” It’s about the total story that you’re trying to tell. You might create something masterful, but if it doesn’t fit with the rest of the story, it’s taking away from that story. Embrace this! It’s about refining, adapting, and learning. Remember, your work isn’t a reflection of your worth. So, if your code or design doesn’t make it to production, don’t mourn it. Each iteration sharpens your skills and builds a foundation for future success.

I have a couple of running docs of things I’ve had to cut from projects. They live there in case I’ll need to use them again. Sometimes it’s helpful to write about it. Maybe you cut some “clever code.” It didn’t fit into the project but you might want to remember how you approached that problem solving. Almost everything we do can be a learning moment. Creative destruction allows us an opportunity for growth and self-refinement.

Final Thoughts

The last five years in tech have taught me a lot about myself. Sometimes it’s important to lean into strengths. Sometimes it’s important to improve our weaknesses. But when it comes down to it, it’s about nurturing resilience, cultivating connections, telling your story, and knowing when to let go. Every experience, from small wins to major setbacks to turning down that unexpected road, adds to the soil that your career grows in.